Mama, I know you’re tired.
You’ve rocked. You’ve nursed. You’ve paced through those late-night stroller walks. Maybe even taken a few midnight car rides just to steal a little peace.
And now, you’re wondering if sleep training could be the answer. But the next question pops up:
“Where do I even begin?”
I’ve been there, too. Let’s walk through this together, with love, calm, and no guilt.
What Is Sleep Training?
Sleep training means teaching your baby how to fall asleep without help. It’s about giving them the skills to sleep peacefully through the night.
It doesn’t have to be harsh. And no, crying it out isn’t the only way. There are gentle sleep training methods that respect your child’s rhythm and your parenting style.
The goal is to get a more predictable baby sleep schedule, a calmer household, and some peace for you, too.
Wondering When to Begin Sleep Training?
Most pediatricians say that it is somewhere between 4 and 6 months. By then, many babies are ready to learn how to sleep on their own.
But the real answer is to start when your baby is ready, and when you’re ready, too.
Look for signs like:
- Your baby can fall asleep without feeding.
- They’re starting to develop a more predictable nap and nighttime routine.
- You’re noticing clear baby sleep cues, like rubbing eyes or getting fussy at certain times.
Related Reading: Sleep Training Isn’t Instant—Here’s the Honest Timeline I Wish I Knew
How to Pick the Right Method
There’s no perfect formula.
Every baby is different. Some parents go for gentle approaches with very little intervention. Others prefer staying close and gradually reducing involvement.
There are many different approaches out there. It’s important to find what suits your family best.
The fading method.
This approach can be a good fit for little ones of all ages, whether you’ve got a baby or a busy toddler.
You stay close during bedtime, maybe by rocking, patting, or sitting nearby. Then slowly reduce your involvement over several nights.
This gentle approach gives your baby comfort and confidence as they get used to falling asleep on their own.
The pick-up/put-down method
This is especially helpful for younger babies, though some toddlers may respond to it too.
The idea is simple. Comfort your child with a quick cuddle when they cry, then gently lay them back down once they’re calm. It teaches them that you’re there when they need comfort, and encourages them to try to settle on their own.
The chair method
At first, you sit in a chair beside your baby or toddler at bedtime. Every couple of nights, gradually move your chair away, until one day you’re no longer needed in the room.
It’s a slower approach that lets your child slowly get used to sleeping without you nearby.
The cry-it-out method (CIO)
It can be a more direct approach and tends to be used with babies over six months and toddlers. Let your child cry for short, planned times before you comfort them.
This method isn’t for every family. But some families feel that, with a careful approach, it helps their child build healthy sleep habits over time.
For working moms, gentle methods usually work best. They help you stay emotionally connected and encourage independence.
Related Reading: We Finally Slept Through the Night—Here’s the Sleep Training Method That Worked!
Step-by-Step: How to Start Sleep Training
Here’s a supportive guide to get started:
1. Create a Cozy Sleep Environment
Keeping the room dark, quiet, and cool can make your baby feel more comfortable and secure. Consider blackout curtains and white noise to signal it’s time for sleep.
2. Establish a Consistent Bedtime Routine
A simple routine signals that bedtime is coming, like:
bath → pajamas → feeding → a short story or lullaby → into the crib.
Tip: Keep the routine the same every night to help their body clock adjust.
3. Start at the Right Time
Avoid sleep training during sleep regressions, teething, or big changes like travel or starting daycare. Aim for a calm, consistent week.
4. Choose Your Sleep Training Method
Pick one approach and stick with it for at least 5–7 nights before deciding if it’s working. Babies thrive on consistency.
5. Help Baby Learn to Self-Soothe
This doesn’t mean ignoring your baby. It means giving them a moment before rushing in, so they have the chance to find their own way to settle.
6. Stay Calm and Confident
Your baby feeds off your energy. Even if you feel unsure, staying calm (even faking it!) helps them feel secure.
Related Reading: How I Got My Baby to Sleep Without Crying It Out
What If Sleep Training Doesn’t Work?
That’s okay. Some babies take longer. Some methods don’t fit every family. You can pause, try something else, or come back when you’re both ready.
And if sleep continues to be a struggle, it’s totally okay to reach out to your pediatrician or a child sleep expert for support.
Final Words from One Tired-but-Hopeful Mom to Another
Sleep training doesn’t mean pushing your baby to sleep. It’s about helping them develop healthy sleep habits. This supports their growth and keeps you sane.
Yes, it takes time.
Yes, there may be setbacks.
But you’re doing an amazing job. You’re here, giving it your all, and pouring so much love into your little one.
And believe me, one day soon, you both will be sleeping better.
If you’re still struggling, you’re not alone.
Check out How to Sleep Train a Difficult Baby. Find the one that fits your family’s rhythm.